The Counsellor's Column

by Gaye Stubbs

(The Gender Centre advise that this article may not be current and as such certain content, including but not limited to persons, contact details and dates may not apply. Where legal authority or medical related matters are cited, responsibility lies with the reader to obtain the most current relevant legal authority and/or medical publication.)

I will be pressing the "Pause" button this Spring ... it is almost five years since I first walked up the steps at Morgan Street.

This will be a writing smorgasbord (take what you like and pass over what is not of interest to you) of news and information.

First, if you need to make contact with me, please call the Gender Centre and leave your name and contact number and I will get back to you. Alternatively, you can email your name and number to: reception@gendercentre.org.au and it will be passed to me. You can also write using Australia Post, now known as "snail mail" although it is actually quite fast.

It's also been a very eventful year so far. External events and conditions impact on us to a greater or lesser degree, depending on individual circumstances, including personal background, stage of life, outlook on life, health, and finances. Sometimes, when a person is down, experiencing self-blame or blaming others, it might be helpful to consider what's happening externally - outside of oneself. For instance, if you're feeling down on a particular day it might be because it's cold and wet; if your friends haven't called, it might be that they're sick in bed; if someone scowls at you as you are walking along the street it might be that this person is feeling down due to the gloomy weather and really not scowling at you. If you suffer from depression it might be beneficial to monitor your moods. Some people find it useful to keep a journal as a way of keeping a record of events, thoughts and emotions. The journal (or a mood graph) can be a useful resource for gaining perspective on life; it could even be a source of rich material for that book you want to write one day. (For useful information and resources, check out the Beyond Blue and Blackdog Institute websites.

Speaking of writing, some people find it useful to write down concerns, questions and points to be raised before coming to a counselling session or before seeing a medical practitioner. In particular you may experience the frustration of waiting for weeks to see a specialist and leaving the consultation you realise you have forgotten to ask about something that had been worrying you or on which you wanted more information. More generally, some people find it useful to write a list of priorities and things to be done on a daily, weekly, or even monthly, basis. This is a way of not being overwhelmed by what may seem unachievable at times.

Moving on, there is a Suggestion Box on the Reception Desk at the Gender Centre. If you have any ideas for workshops or groups, put them in the box or send them in. Constructive feedback is helpful to the service. There have been generous donations made (over the years) of ideas, articles found and articles written, dvds, books, the sharing of information, financial donations, as well as the offer to share knowledge and experience in a formal group situation.

Some of you may have watched "Catalyst" on July 4th. The episode dealt with recent research into the occurrence of men experiencing pregnancy symptoms simultaneously with their pregnant wives. Research suggests that this phenomenon (known as couvade syndrome) occurs due to hormonal changes taking place in the "soon-to-be" dad, possibly brought about by pheromones and the D.N.A. of the father. This may not be news to some of you who have reported experiencing inexplicable feminising physical changes at different stages of life, not due to hormone therapy. Or it may be interesting news for those of you who have expressed an intensified need to be female at different life stages ... not uncommonly after the birth of a child. If you are interested to find out more, check out the A.B.C. website (see Fatherhood and the Male Pregnancy).

The Standards of Care established by the World Professional Association Guidelines for Transgender Health have not been revised as yet but ... stay tuned. Finally, as I have told some of you, I will be pressing the "Pause" button this Spring ... it is almost five years since I first walked up the steps at Morgan Street. I look forward to introducing the new counsellor to those of you who visit the counselling room and as I will not be leaving until September I will write my farewells in the next issue.

Polare is published in Australia by The Gender Centre Inc. which is funded by the Department of Community Services under the S.A.A.P. Program and supported by the N.S.W. Health Department through the AIDS and Infectious Diseases Branch. Polare provides a forum for discussion and debate on gender issues. Advertisers are advised that all advertising is their responsibility under the Trade Practices Act. Unsolicited contributions are welcome, though no guarantee is made by the Editor that they will be published, nor any discussion entered into. The editor reserves the right to edit such contributions without notification. Any submission which appears in Polare may be published on our internet site. Opinions expressed in this publication do not necessarily reflect those of the Editor, The Gender Centre Inc.I, the Department of Community Services or the N.S.W. Department of Health.