My Story

Telling the Truth

Reprinted from The Seahorse Times, October 1999, by Tanya

(The Gender Centre advise that this article may not be current and as such certain content, including but not limited to persons, contact details and dates may not apply. Where legal authority or medical related matters are cited, responsibility lies with the reader to obtain the most current relevant legal authority and/or medical publication.)

I had intended telling my interviewer the truth then and there but I lacked the courage when actually in his presence, because of the "perceived" reaction

To come to terms with reality in our lives, to try to come to terms about what we are in our society, what man expects: approaching this new millennium can be "scary" and "frightening" despite our so called age of enlightenment. Making us, who live in "no mans land" where, still prejudice, is on many people's minds, and where people like us experience hurtful comments that are able to get into one's deepest soul.

But somehow there are some people possessing great understanding and compassion. About these people I wish to share with you my recent experience, and the absolute deepest satisfaction and joy that it had given to me then, and even now, weeks later.

A good friend of mine had recommended me to his employer, not knowing me personally. All he knew of me were what my skills and experience (job related) nothing of the personal torment. At the time, I was hoping to find some other employment anyway, but also knowing that my age, not to mention my transsexuality, would make it almost impossible for me to be a successful contender for any position in the workforce.

I went to the interview and I sat opposite a young man who did not even want to see my resume, but said he'd rather judge people on his "gut instinct". Somehow, I sensed an open minded, and modern thinking individual in front of me. I was shown around and I knew that I would be quite competent in the work they expected me to do.

If only I could get the position, being truthful about myself, bearing in mind that days would be lost owing to impending doctor's appointments. To me, truth prior to my accepting the appointment was paramount for obvious reasons.

I had intended telling my interviewer the truth then and there but I lacked the courage when actually in his presence, because of the "perceived" reaction. I was offered the position, but I was hardly satisfied with my behaviour in the circumstances.

That night spent in regurgitating the whole issue, but even more, my untruthfulness. I decided to phone at the earliest opportunity to set things right. You can well imagine my emotional state.

After the pleasantries were over, I started to confess, and was quite prepared to be met with the response, "I am sorry ..." or "In this case, we as a company would be unhappy ..." or similar responses to this. No! On the contrary!

I was met with "We do not have a problem with your transsexuality and we will be pleased to see you in two weeks."

Even more, on their written confirmation, they made me welcome, and later in person thanked me for my honesty.

In conclusion, I would like to affirm that contrary to the view that we are lead to believe, the one that society holds, there are still people who do not judge books by their covers, or judge people as the majority judges people, but meet a person on their own merit and behave decently and compassionately toward that person.

They have reached out, and I am most grateful to them.

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